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I AM FINE NOW. (gun bars for my battle with depression)

by Lamon Manuel

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IF YOU REALLY WANTED TO MESS ME UP, YOU SHOULD'VE GOT TO ME BEFORE ERIKA!

lyrics

i'm fine. built a skull taj mahal for no sleepers. new black funeral masks for a cult of cult leaders. the least high. leech hive. worst case worm-infested. voted most likely to wear another man's face to his wedding. eight ball, russian doll? it'll make your insides' insides magic. it's a simple "bye, alex." or we'll impulsive buy caskets. black friend sweat arachnid nest. vogue hilarity. three wishes for tricia oaks to fuck, marry and bury me. keep busy. black dementia. rehearsed smile's a go-to. hi, i enjoy cheap whiskey and long walks through chernobyl. so us. love, throw another atlas shrugged on the fire. coven summons for black therapists. coming out oft-unwired. cheap apothecary trips. hell if the shotgun said it wrong. "you can make anything look like an accident," or panic when monday claws. proper voodoo: palm reading the shakes. coaxed to settle it. half-man, half my weight in tangled cobra skeletons.

i'm fine. but the shotgun said, "what that mouth do?" black affluenza trending some death i'll get around to. bet it's cheap talk, dream or drink. guts-schemed houndstooth. you are what you eat. no, you've armed what surrounds you. pardon. how bad you wanton? down those shards in that spilled milk. one ketamine shovel for the lucky house appeal built. no half-waking no halfway king. a keep of old guilt and quote the fine line between road head and roadkill. call me if you and your sister want to be eskimo siblings. i mean, my balls and my word came dressed for casual villainy. two-stepping off a pier into the ocean. i wrote this slumming apex consumers' plumbed impatience for jokes. now when i say firing you say squad. and better's an iffy fetish for pissing a $40K day job. like "the can't rap aesthetic" flexed'll jetsam your liver. feels classy when the waves of decay come in snifters.

i try not to be so superficial, you know? (you know?) i want to hate myself for who i am more than i hate myself for what i look like.

credits

released April 1, 2020
Produced by DOS4GW
Recorded and mixed by Sean Owens (Lounge Fidelity)
Mastered by Willie Green (Willie Green Music)
Photography by Brita Kristel A Enflo
Edit by Patrick Childers (Lt Headtrip)

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Lamon Manuel Chicago, Illinois

you either die a hero or live long enough to become a rapper with a band.

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